The Contender Wrap
I hope for Sugar Ray's sake that that snooze of a final didn't kill the franchise. Sugar got a little heavy on the hype during the intro by comparing it to the Super Bowl. I like it Ray, but that's a little strong. Had some solid fights this year, though I think last year's show was better on the human drama scale. Can I say it? I miss Sly. Last year Ray & Sly sit together ringside, this year it's Ray & last year's winner Sergio Mora. Big drop off.
Whatever happened to:The Challenges - You lose to much high comedy potential doing away with them. This year the first half hour of the show dragged to the extent that by the second half of the season, I was tuning in for the fights only. That's bad Ray. I thought you'd want to know. Why not product place the crap out of them? If these guys are truly hungry, and it seems that a lot of them are, you can have some seriously competitive challenges if you dangle the right carrot.
The Crazy Family Member - Maybe I missed somebody tuning in for the fight only, but from what I saw nobody, and I mean nobody, approached Manfredo's dad on the crazy scale. I know they have to focus on casting the boxers. If it comes down to a tiebreaker on anybody, please, please go with the guy who's related to somebody insane. I hardly even saw any spouses going to the corner giving useless obvious advice. "Honey, you've got to get going!!" Thanks sweetheart, loads of help. I think that humanizes the boxers more than anything. Hey, he's got a bitchey wife. I can relate. Imagine if your own wife could come down to the office and give you encouragement. "Honey, you've got to get going on those TPR reports!!" Wait, don't imagine that's a bad imagine.
Celebrity Cameos - All I remember this year was Burt Reynolds who looked like he's practically dead. I don't think Burt can move his head from side to side anymore. It makes it hard to talk to Ray when you move about as lifelike as Abe Lincoln at the hall of presidents. Outside of that who'd we get? Last year's guys, couple of other boxers, and, oh yeah, Willie McGinest. Let's cheese this up a little. Empty the D list on this thing. It's just like the product placement, you know they're dying to get on. Theme it. One week empty the Love Boat, next it's the A-Team. Are any of them working? We can spend the commercials playing, "Hey wasn't that...". If they can find 10 fat has beens for Celebrity Fit Club, they can find 3 for Ray. Make it a circus. That way if the fight's a snoozer, you can fill the time with cut shots. What major fight doesn't have celebrities ring side?
Sly - O.K., I already said it, but it bears repeating. He was missed badly. His pseudo-seriousness was just off the charts hilarious. We missed his catch phrase, "Toe da line." We missed him sitting with Ray during fights punctuating every big blow with his Balboa-istic exclamations. And we missed the closing shot cast meeting with Boss Sly sitting behind the desk on 2 phone books. The boxers love him like I imagine hockey players love Paul Newman. The difference is Paul Newman played Reggie Dunlop. Sly is Rocky Balboa. And Sergio Mora, the seat replacement? Stop acting like your Ray's equal in boxing. Once I'd like to see Mora talk, Ray rolls his eyes, and Ray slaps him. Once.
The Promoter - Remember her from the first season? I do. She had that mature sexpot thing going. She also had virtually zero lines so she was pretty easy to move off in season 2. Have her in there teasing the boxers, maybe incorporate her into one of the challenges. Ramp up the moral conflict. Oh wait, that's right. Boxers never get in trouble with women, and TV never uses sex to sell. It will never work.
Heavyweights - I asked for them in last year's wrap review. It's an obvious choice. The challenges alone would be worth it. You could sprinkle in fraternity pranks with the challenges. Race 'em in Speedos through the city square. Cut the fights down to 3 rounds and show us the whole fight, or at least more of it. Please, the big fellas are where the show needs to go from here.
Finally, as a public service, I give you:
Drinking Game for the Finale Repeats - And you know they'll repeat it, just like they pound poker programming. Every time Teddy Atlas says, "bigger, stronger man", hit it. You'll be lit in no time.
Good luck Ray. Bring it back.
